I am extremely agitated and yet it’s all so quiet in here right now. It seems, sometimes anyway, that just when I think (rarely really) I have it all under control some piece of string that somehow was holding it all together starts unraveling at a speed that I can’t see coming much less control. Maybe that’s what brings on my drinking bouts. I am sitting here, self-diagnosing again. One, because I haven’t been to the doctor, who’s probably gonna fucking yell at me since I haven’t yet done one thing she prescribed for me last time I was there. Two, because my skin has started doing crazy shit lately- bruises from nowhere, rashes that come and disappear when I’m about to show them to somebody so the only recourse I’ve had is surfing the net looking for cases that might be similar enough to mine so I can then pick them out of the thousands of listed maladies and assign those to myself. That’s not going so good, the pictures on the internet are simply gross and extremely saddening- there’re a lot of kids with bad rashes out there.
You can probably tell I’ve been really busy since I haven’t had the moment or moments to actually sit and put thoughts on paper. Busy between the two worlds, the working and trying to get this remote office-working down pat and drinking myself silly when I make it back home for the weekends. In case you were wondering if that’s a smart thing to do, I highly discourage you from doing it. Granted, I won’t myself stop doing it anytime soon but I will tell you not to do it. Well, Maybe I’ll stop it- but chances are I’ll probably go hang out with people as soon as I make it into the city limits and like I’ve mentioned before- all my friends are alcoholics. I wonder what my liver looks like these days.
I figured I’d be better off laying off the PBR and drinking wine, but being a wino is some hard work and it’s much more expensive, so now I gotta figure something else out- ‘cause the wino weekend did not work out too well for me. Maybe staying in and being anti-social is the only answer, ‘cause I certainly can’t commit to hanging out w/ a bunch of drunks when I’m not one of the bunches of drunks in the room. Plus, it seems I make rather hasty decisions when I drink these drinks I drink. For instance, last Saturday while hanging out at one of our better local restaurants a kid in a wheel chair showed up and all of the sudden I find myself in the midst of a gun buying ceremony. The kid said he usually carries two guns and often practices on the weekends and will include free training to anyone who buys one of the guns he’ll provide. Hey, I thought, as I watched the Romanian’s girlfriend trying to keep her new ferret inside her purse, I need a gun. I can use it if someone ever tries to attack me again. Yeah, I should get a gun. The kid in the wheelchair kept demonstrating the insertion and extraction of cartridges from the two guns he had laid on one of the tables. The restaurant was closed and now that I think about it- I hope the owner was smart enough to lock the doors.
The one thing that kept going thru my mind, besides the wine and the thought of what a good idea it was to buy a gun right then, was wanting to ask the kid how he got in the wheelchair to begin with, but I figured it probably wasn’t such a good idea to ask him all that infront of all his eager customers. He finally got tired ‘cause all the drunks that had bought were done and they kept pointing the gun around, it wasn’t loaded but it was still unnerving to him it seemed, so he promptly collected his stuff put it away in the confines of his socks and pants and announced that he was off to find a poker game somewhere. But I can call him anytime to schedule some shooting practice- it can’t hurt to actually know how to use a gun, can it?
You can probably tell I’ve been really busy since I haven’t had the moment or moments to actually sit and put thoughts on paper. Busy between the two worlds, the working and trying to get this remote office-working down pat and drinking myself silly when I make it back home for the weekends. In case you were wondering if that’s a smart thing to do, I highly discourage you from doing it. Granted, I won’t myself stop doing it anytime soon but I will tell you not to do it. Well, Maybe I’ll stop it- but chances are I’ll probably go hang out with people as soon as I make it into the city limits and like I’ve mentioned before- all my friends are alcoholics. I wonder what my liver looks like these days.
I figured I’d be better off laying off the PBR and drinking wine, but being a wino is some hard work and it’s much more expensive, so now I gotta figure something else out- ‘cause the wino weekend did not work out too well for me. Maybe staying in and being anti-social is the only answer, ‘cause I certainly can’t commit to hanging out w/ a bunch of drunks when I’m not one of the bunches of drunks in the room. Plus, it seems I make rather hasty decisions when I drink these drinks I drink. For instance, last Saturday while hanging out at one of our better local restaurants a kid in a wheel chair showed up and all of the sudden I find myself in the midst of a gun buying ceremony. The kid said he usually carries two guns and often practices on the weekends and will include free training to anyone who buys one of the guns he’ll provide. Hey, I thought, as I watched the Romanian’s girlfriend trying to keep her new ferret inside her purse, I need a gun. I can use it if someone ever tries to attack me again. Yeah, I should get a gun. The kid in the wheelchair kept demonstrating the insertion and extraction of cartridges from the two guns he had laid on one of the tables. The restaurant was closed and now that I think about it- I hope the owner was smart enough to lock the doors.
The one thing that kept going thru my mind, besides the wine and the thought of what a good idea it was to buy a gun right then, was wanting to ask the kid how he got in the wheelchair to begin with, but I figured it probably wasn’t such a good idea to ask him all that infront of all his eager customers. He finally got tired ‘cause all the drunks that had bought were done and they kept pointing the gun around, it wasn’t loaded but it was still unnerving to him it seemed, so he promptly collected his stuff put it away in the confines of his socks and pants and announced that he was off to find a poker game somewhere. But I can call him anytime to schedule some shooting practice- it can’t hurt to actually know how to use a gun, can it?
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